+The Infamous Hello World Program.
+Romeo, a young man with a remarkable patience.
+Juliet, a likewise young woman of remarkable grace.
+Ophelia, a remarkable woman much in dispute with Hamlet.
+Hamlet, the flatterer of Andersen Insulting A/S.
+ Scene I: The insulting of Romeo.
+[Enter Hamlet and Romeo]
+ You lying stupid fatherless big smelly half-witted coward!
+ You are as stupid as the difference between a handsome rich brave
+ hero and thyself! Speak your mind!
+ You are as brave as the sum of your fat little stuffed misused dusty
+ old rotten codpiece and a beautiful fair warm peaceful sunny summer day.
+ You are as healthy as the difference between the sum of the
+ sweetest reddest rose and my father and yourself! Speak your mind!
+ You are as cowardly as the sum of yourself and the difference
+ between a big mighty proud kingdom and a horse. Speak your mind.
+ Scene II: The praising of Juliet.
+ Scene III: The praising of Ophelia.
+ Thou art as lovely as the product of a large rural town and my amazing
+ bottomless embroidered purse. Speak thy mind!
+ Thou art as loving as the product of the bluest clearest sweetest sky
+ and the sum of a squirrel and a white horse. Thou art as beautiful as
+ the difference between Juliet and thyself. Speak thy mind!
+[Exeunt Ophelia and Hamlet]
+ Scene I: Romeo and Juliet's conversation.
+[Enter Romeo and Juliet]
+ Speak your mind. You are as worried as the sum of yourself and the
+ difference between my small smooth hamster and my nose. Speak your
+ Speak YOUR mind! You are as bad as Hamlet! You are as small as the
+ difference between the square of the difference between my little pony
+ and your big hairy hound and the cube of your sorry little
+ codpiece. Speak your mind!
+ Scene II: Juliet and Ophelia's conversation.
+ Thou art as good as the quotient between Romeo and the sum of a small
+ furry animal and a leech. Speak your mind!
+ Thou art as disgusting as the quotient between Romeo and twice the
+ difference between a mistletoe and an oozing infected blister! Speak