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t2/humour.html.wml

 <h2 id="intro">Introduction</h2>
 
 <p>
-This is a growing collection of aphorisms and funny bits I came up with 
+This is a growing collection of aphorisms and funny bits I came up with
 throughout the years. They are arranged in roughly chronlogical order.
 </p>
 
 
 <toc />
 
-<header_joke id="jewish_deduction" header="A Jewish Deduction"> 
+<header_joke id="jewish_deduction" header="A Jewish Deduction">
 
 <p>
-The Bible dictates that "Thou shalt not seethe [=cook] a kid [= young goat] 
-in his mother's milk." To avoid any possibility of breaking that regulation, 
-the Jewish tradition ruled that it also applies to female goats, 
-to mature goats, and to the meat and milk of two completely unrelated 
-goats. It is also forbidden to eat the meat with fresh milk, and it 
-applies to beef and mutten as well (including mixing the milk and meat 
-of two different beasts). Finally, chicken, which are incapable of 
-milk production, may not be eaten along with any mammal's milk either. 
+The Bible dictates that "Thou shalt not seethe [=cook] a kid [= young goat]
+in his mother's milk." To avoid any possibility of breaking that regulation,
+the Jewish tradition ruled that it also applies to female goats,
+to mature goats, and to the meat and milk of two completely unrelated
+goats. It is also forbidden to eat the meat with fresh milk, and it
+applies to beef and mutten as well (including mixing the milk and meat
+of two different beasts). Finally, chicken, which are incapable of
+milk production, may not be eaten along with any mammal's milk either.
 </p>
 
 <p>
-We are fortunate that most mathematicians were not Jewish. Otherwise, 
+We are fortunate that most mathematicians were not Jewish. Otherwise,
 it would have been forbidden to divide by all numbers between -1 and 1.
 </p>
 
 Or alternatively:
 </p>
 <p>
-God is all the shit, all the non-shit and all the intermediate demi-shits in 
+God is all the shit, all the non-shit and all the intermediate demi-shits in
 between.
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 </p>
 
 <p>
-"C programming is no more about computers than astronomy is about 
+"C programming is no more about computers than astronomy is about
 stars."
 </p>
 
 
 <header_joke id="more_experienced_programmer" header="A more experienced programmer...">
 <p>
-A more experienced programmer does not make less bugs. He just realizes 
+A more experienced programmer does not make less bugs. He just realizes
 what went wrong more quickly.
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 
 <header_joke id="I_promised" header="I promised, I forgot, I broke my promise...">
 <p>
-I promised, I forgot, I broke my promise - just shoot me and get on 
+I promised, I forgot, I broke my promise - just shoot me and get on
 with it!
 </p>
 
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 
-<header_joke id="first_phrase" 
+<header_joke id="first_phrase"
 header="The First Phrase that needs to be Taught">
 <p>
-The first phrase that needs to be taught when teaching a new language is how to 
+The first phrase that needs to be taught when teaching a new language is how to
 say "Do you speak English?".
 </p>
 
 <p>
-The first thing that needs to be taught when teaching a new computer tool 
+The first thing that needs to be taught when teaching a new computer tool
 is how to exit it.
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 
 <p class="indent">
 <i>If you don't understand it, either forget it or consult the following
-threads: 
+threads:
 <a href="http://groups.google.com/groups?hl=en&amp;threadm=deca99a9.0110250144.654613e9%40posting.google.com&amp;prev=/groups%3Fnum%3D25%26hl%3Den%26group%3Dhumanities.philosophy.objectivism%26start%3D25%26group%3Dhumanities.philosophy.objectivism">Usenet</a>,
-<a href="http://www.mail-archive.com/lin-club@vipe.technion.ac.il/msg00750.html">Haifa 
+<a href="http://www.mail-archive.com/lin-club@vipe.technion.ac.il/msg00750.html">Haifa
 Linux Club</a></i>
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 <header_joke id="reinvent_the_wheel" header="Re-inventing the Wheel">
 
 <p>
-He who re-invents the wheel, will understand much better how a 
+He who re-invents the wheel, will understand much better how a
 wheel works.
 </p>
 
 </p>
 
 <p class="indent">
-<i>You have to be a relatively experienced hacker to get this joke. So don't 
+<i>You have to be a relatively experienced hacker to get this joke. So don't
 worry if you don't understand it.</i>
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 </p>
 
 <p class="indent">
-	Muli Ben-Yeuhuda on #kernelnewbies (irc.kernelnewbiews.org)
+Muli Ben-Yeuhuda on #kernelnewbies (irc.kernelnewbiews.org)
 </p>
 
 <p>
 </p>
 
 <p class="indent">
-	Shlomi Fish on #offtopic (irc.kernelnewbies.org)
+Shlomi Fish on #offtopic (irc.kernelnewbies.org)
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 
 sense nonetheless.
 </header_joke>
 
-<header_joke id="foreign_languages" header="Foreign Languages"> 
+<header_joke id="foreign_languages" header="Foreign Languages">
 
 <p>
 <i>[Discussing Foreign Languages Knowledge in the U.S.A]</i>
 <div class="indent">
 <p>
 <i>
-I originally thought of something similar to that about 
+I originally thought of something similar to that about
 <a href="http://www.stallman.org/">Richard M. Stallman</a> who has headed the
-<a href="http://www.fsf.org/">Free Software Foundation</a> and its GNU 
-project since it's inception. He is known for his radical and uncomprising 
+<a href="http://www.fsf.org/">Free Software Foundation</a> and its GNU
+project since it's inception. He is known for his radical and uncomprising
 views that combine both idealism and just plain stubburness. Otherwise, he's
-a great and noble guy, and I had the opportunity of meeting and talking 
+a great and noble guy, and I had the opportunity of meeting and talking
 him during his visit to Israel. (He is much more pleasant in real life than
 online.)
 </i>
 Linus Torvalds: "95% of Programmers consider themselves in the top 5%".
 </p>
 <p>
-Shlomi Fish's Corollary: "95% of Programmers consider 95% of the code they did not write, in the bottom 5%." 
+Shlomi Fish's Corollary: "95% of Programmers consider 95% of the code they did not write, in the bottom 5%."
 </p>
 <div class="indent">
 <p>
 </header_joke>
 
 <header_joke id="too_girly" header="Too Girly">
-<pre>  
-  &lt;rindolf&gt;    Linuxgrrl: well The Gilmore Girls is also a drama. Sort 
+<pre>
+  &lt;rindolf&gt;    Linuxgrrl: well The Gilmore Girls is also a drama. Sort
                of a dramedie, but a serious one.
 &lt;Linuxgrrl&gt;    Meh.
 &lt;Linuxgrrl&gt;    Too girly for me.
   &lt;rindolf&gt;    Linuxgrrl: you are a girl.
-  &lt;rindolf&gt;    Linuxgrrl: let me guess - you're using Debian or Gentoo, 
+  &lt;rindolf&gt;    Linuxgrrl: let me guess - you're using Debian or Gentoo,
                right?
 &lt;Linuxgrrl&gt;    Gentoo.
   &lt;rindolf&gt;    Linuxgrrl: knew it.
 C++ is complex, complexifying and complexified.
 </p>
 <p>
-(With apologies to the Oxford English Dictionary). 
+(With apologies to the Oxford English Dictionary).
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 
 
 <header_joke id="tcl_is_lisp_on_drugs" header="Tcl is Lisp on Drugs...">
 <p>
-Tcl is LISP on drugs. Using strings instead of S-expressions for closures is 
-Evil with one of those gigantic E's you can find at the beginning of 
+Tcl is LISP on drugs. Using strings instead of S-expressions for closures is
+Evil with one of those gigantic E's you can find at the beginning of
 book chapters.
 </p>
 </header_joke>
 <header_joke id="to_err_is_human_corrolaries" header="Corrolaries to &quot;To err is human&hellip;&quot;">
 
 <p>
-Here are some corrolaries to <q>To err is human - to forgive divine</q>. 
+Here are some corrolaries to <q>To err is human - to forgive divine</q>.
 </p>
 
 <ul>
 
 <div class="indent">
 <p>
-<i>There's more about Chuck Norris and Perl 6 
-<a href="$(ROOT)/humour/fortunes/shlomif.html">in this 
-Unix fortune file</a> and more about Norris on 
-<a href="http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/">the Chuck Norris Facts 
+<i>There's more about Chuck Norris and Perl 6
+<a href="$(ROOT)/humour/fortunes/shlomif.html">in this
+Unix fortune file</a> and more about Norris on
+<a href="http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/">the Chuck Norris Facts
 web-site.</a>.</i>
 </p>
 </div>
 
 <header_joke id="internet_porn" header="Blocking Internet Pornography">
 <p>
-Trying to block Internet pornography is like climbing a waterfall and trying 
+Trying to block Internet pornography is like climbing a waterfall and trying
 to stay dry.
 </p>
 <p>
 
 <p>
 <i>I feel a bit uneasy about saying it, but it is still kind of funny, for
-those who like <a href="http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/">Chuck 
+those who like <a href="http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/">Chuck
 Norris facts</a></i>
 </p>
 
     &lt;muli&gt;  sarnold, have you got one of those pesky things?
  &lt;sarnold&gt;  muli: just Bachelor of Arts .. no Masters or Ph.D...
  &lt;rindolf&gt;  sarnold: B.Sc or B.A.?
-    &lt;muli&gt;  rindolf, Bachelor of Arts is B.A. 
+    &lt;muli&gt;  rindolf, Bachelor of Arts is B.A.
  &lt;rindolf&gt;  muli: I know. But I was just checking.
- &lt;sarnold&gt;  rindolf: ah, you&#39;re right, B.Sc.. I chickened out on the language 
+ &lt;sarnold&gt;  rindolf: ah, you&#39;re right, B.Sc.. I chickened out on the language
             requirements :)
  &lt;rindolf&gt;  muli: see?? LOL.
-    &lt;muli&gt;  rindolf, sometimes, two bugs cancel each other.  
+    &lt;muli&gt;  rindolf, sometimes, two bugs cancel each other.
  &lt;rindolf&gt;  muli: wisely spoken.
  &lt;rindolf&gt;  But mine wasn&#39;t a bug - it was a sanity check.
 
 <div class="indent">
 
 <p>
-This is an anti-thesis to the fact that many <a 
+This is an anti-thesis to the fact that many <a
 href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Feminazi">Feminazis</a> claim that using
 "girl" for "a female guy", is derogatory, despite the fact that it is very
 common, and quite harmless. In Hebrew, there's a perfectly good word for
 
 <p>
 So I'm going to continue using "girl" for a "female guy", regardless of what
-other people think. I also don't mind using the term 
-<a href="http://shlomif.livejournal.com/53966.html">nazi for someone 
+other people think. I also don't mind using the term
+<a href="http://shlomif.livejournal.com/53966.html">nazi for someone
 who's unnecessarily strict</a> or calling Black people "Negros", which is
 just the Spanish word for the colour "Black".
 </p>
 <header_joke id="wikipedia_has" header="Wikipedia has…">
 
 <p>
-Wikipedia has a page about everything including the 
+Wikipedia has a page about everything including the
 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitchen_sink">http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kitchen_sink</a> .
 </p>
 
 <header_joke id="chuck-norris-and-wikipedia-deletionists" header="Chuck Norris and Wikipedia Deletionists">
 
 <p>
-Deletionists beware! If you delete Chuck Norris' Wikipedia submission, he 
+Deletionists beware! If you delete Chuck Norris' Wikipedia submission, he
 will delete you!
 </p>