+I don't believe in fairies. Oops! A fairy died.
+I don't believe in fairies. Oops! Another fairy died.
+The prefix "God Said" has the extraordinary logical property of converting any
+statement that follows it into a true one.
+I used to be arrogant. Now I'm simply Perfect.
+ -- one of Shlomi Fish's relative.
+Microsoft - making it all make sense. Ours.
+Linux - Because Software Problems Should not Cost Money.
+The American Lottery - all you need is a dollar and a dream. We will take the
+dollar, but you can keep the dream.
+Judaism: God knows you will do shit, does nothing to prevent it, but makes you
+take the blame for it anyways.
+Judaism: God is all the shit, all the non-shit and all the intermediate
+Oh! I wish you could see the look on his face! Actually, I would have also
+liked to see the look on his face, but just then I woke up from the dream.
+-- "The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight It"
+Had I not been already insane, I would have long ago driven myself mad.
+-- "The Enemy and how I Helped to Fight It"
+A more experienced programmer does not make less bugs. He just realizes what
+went wrong more quickly.
+Knuth is not God! It took him two days to build the Roman Empire.
+Knuth is not God! God has already released TeX version 4.0.
+There is no IGLU Cabal! None of them could pass the Turing test. But strangely
+enough a computer program they coded, could.
+Knuth is not God! Typing "God" into Google and pressing "I'm Feeling Lucky"
+would not lead you to his homepage.
+Knuth is not God! Unless you confuse him with Dijkstra.
+C++ supports Object-Oriented Programming roughly as much as COBOL supports
+I hope that if it had not been clear before, it isn't less clear now.
+-- One of Shlomi Fish's Technion Lecturers
+My opinions may seem crazy but they all make sense. Insane sense, but sense
+There's no point in keeping an idea to yourself since there's a 10 to 1 chance
+that somebody already has it and will share it before you.
+An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
+Two apples a day will keep two doctors away. (-- one of Shlomi Fish's relatives)
+"You are banished! You are banished! You are banished! - hey I'm just
+He has a high degree of idealism, a high degree of stubbornness, and an even
+higher degree of inability to distiniguish between the two.
+If his programming is anything like his philosophising, he would find ten
+imaginary bugs in the "Hello World" program.
+Hacker sees bug. Hacker does not want bug. Hacker fixes bug.
+Tcl is Lisp on drugs. Using strings instead of S-expressions for closures is
+Evil with one of those gigantic E's you can find at the beginning of chapters.
+95% of Programmers consider 95% of the code they did not write, in the bottom
+No self-respecting tomboy would use Mandriva.
+C++ is complex, complexifying and complexified.
+(With apologies to the Oxford English Dictionary).
+-- Moses the Smiley by Shlomi Fish
+The first phrase that need to be taught when teaching a new language is how to
+say "Do you speak English?". The first thing that needs to be taught when
+teaching a new computer tool is how to exit it.
+He who re-invents the wheel, will understand much better how a wheel works.
+He who re-invents the wheel, may actually invent a much better wheel.
+He who re-invents the wheel will likely design a square wheel and spend a year
+trying to figure out why it doesn't work properly. -- Nadav Har'El
+Sometimes you don't need to be familiar with a better alternative to know that
+something sucks. Take Microsoft Word for example.
+-- Shlomi Fish's friend.
+The difference between a good student and a bad student is that a bad student
+forgets the material five minutes before the test, while a good student five
+ -- One of Shlomi Fish's Technion Lecturer
+Real programmers don't write workarounds. They tell their users to upgrade
+Jewish Atheists are the only true Atheists. They beat the hell out of Goy
+Except for boastfulness, rashness is my only defect!
+-- Based on http://www.shlomifish.org/humour/TheEnemy/ .
+If it isn't in my email, it doesn't exist.
+And if the whole world says one thing and my email says something different,
+The bad thing about hardware is that it sometimes work and sometimes doesn't.
+The good thing about software is that it's consistent: it always does not
+work, and it always does not work in exactly the same way.
+Larry Wall can understand the Perl code he wrote last year.
+Larry Wall gets the colon.
+There are at least 137 Larry Walls in the U.S. but only one that matters.
+Larry Wall applies a patch manually quicker than GNU patch.
+Larry Wall dreams in Perl.
+Larry Wall can program in his sleep.
+Larry Wall is lazy, impatient and full of hubris.
+Larry Wall has more dollars in the bank than in his Perl code.
+Electrical Engineering studies. In the Technion. Been there. Done that. Forgot
+a lot. Remember too much.
+I'm not an actor - I just play one on T.V.
+Trying to block Internet pornography is like climbing a waterfall and trying
+to stay dry. (-- one of Shlomi Fish's Internet Friends)
+"I'm not straight - I'm Israeli."
+It does not mean what I think it means, but it means what *you* think it
+We don't know his cellphone number, and even if we did, we would tell you that
+What do you mean by "WDYM"?
+I'd do Windows-- , but this may result in an integer underflow.
+Nobody expects the Randal Schwartz condition!
+I often wonder why I hang out with so many people who are so pedantic. And
+then I remember - because they are so pedantic.
+Ran Eilam To Shlomi Fish: so what are you working on? Working on a new wiki
+about unit testing fortunes in freecell?
+You can never really appreciate The Gilmore Girls until you've watched it in
+God gave us two eyes and ten fingers so we will type five times as much as we
+Only wimps complain about bad code. Real men clean it up.
+Wikipedia has a page about everything including the
+*shlomif:* hack, hack, hack ; save ; make ; make test; commit. And start over.
+*mrjink:*hack, hack, hack; save; make; swear; fix typos; save; make; make
+test; swear some more; hack some more; save; make; make test; cheer; commit.
+*meep:* hack, make, test, segfault, oh noes, revert to previous revision
+What does "IDK" stand for? I don't know.
+Give me ASCII or give me deaþ!
+In the Technion, there are many ways to get from one place to the other, but
+they are all the same length.
+English spelling aims to be consistent. Publicly and methodically.